Little Secrets Read online

  Chapter V

  Was he really going to be her papa? Eliza had difficulty containing her excitement as the weekend crawled by. She did not want to get overly eager only to feel disappointment when he did not come to visit her. Headmaster Philip had yet to inform her about the new marriage arrangement. Would he give her the news any time soon? She had felt a bit disappointed at not having had the opportunity to speak with her father when he had visited. Eliza had caught a glimpse of him in his waistcoat, stalking down the hall, a frown crossing his features. Nanny Agnes had unfortunately kept her from leaving the room and running after him. In truth, her father was not a man who would have cared for any dramatics or affection anyway. He never gave more than a passing glance on occasion, and Eliza really could not recall any real signs of love or tenderness being given by the man. Such things were not the ways of her father, and she had long ago accepted that.

  It had been three days since she had laid eyes on Mr. Lockwood, the man who had said she was to call him papa. The butterflies had not ceased, and though she was constantly asking her nanny about Mr. Lockwood, the older woman seemed not to know anything.

  Eliza did not want to be wrong. He would come back for her, wouldn't he? When he did, she needed to charm him and show her new papa that she was worth his time and devotion to her. Eliza may have been dressed as a little one, but she had not forgotten the responsibilities of an adult. Charley likely had a job that kept him away from the chateau. She had chalked that very reason up to why Preston had not come to visit her more often.

  From within the nursery, she dipped her brush in the blue paint and smacked the canvas with the medium, making a mess as her attention was trained on the window.

  "Little Eliza, what in heavens are you looking for?" Nanny Agnes asked.

  Apparently, even with Eliza's plethora of questions, it had not fazed the older woman that she was waiting to catch sight of Charley Lockwood. Eliza felt as though she might wait forever. When would she see him again? It seemed papas usually paid their little ones a visit on the weekends, but he had not yet come.

  Maybe it was foolish of her to let her mind wander, thinking about a man she had no ties to. Her thoughts were best kept secret, if she did not want to be forced into the care of Doctor Colt.

  Eliza wore a cloth overcoat to keep the paint from touching her dress. She dipped the brush again in the bright blue cup of paint before striking the paper. Blue dripped down onto her shoes and then the floor, from the brush. She paid no attention to the mess she was making.

  Headmaster Philip headed out the door and presumably down the steps. Was he meeting with Mr. Lockwood? She continued to quietly paint, her eyes trained on the window to the left of the nannies, their backs to the commotion behind them.

  Eliza found it difficult to stand still, her attention hardly on the canvas. She waited, holding her breath, as the door across the hall opened. Would it be her new papa? Chewing anxiously on her bottom lip, she jumped up and down, squealing at the sight of Mr. Charley Lockwood.

  Nanny Agnes raised an eyebrow at her charge. "Is everything all right with you, girl?"

  "Yes, Nanny Agnes," Eliza said. She took several deep breaths, trying to calm her racing heart.

  The other girls seemed oblivious to her outburst, or perhaps had chosen to ignore her.

  "Psst!" she whispered, trying to get Clara's attention. Over the past several months, the young blonde had grown to become her best friend. They shared stories of both their previous lives before attending Ashby and of their discipline sessions, comparing notes as to which girl had the worst nanny. Clara had Nanny Beth, and by the stories and looks of the older woman, her friend won every time.

  Clara glanced up, paintbrush poised in her hand.

  "Clara, I need your help," Eliza said, leaning toward her friend's side, tugging on her arm to get her attention as she painted a scene outside of daisies in a meadow. The picture looked quite good, not that Eliza was ready to admit that to her friend. She probably would never live it down, considering her abstract blob of blue.

  The blonde turned her head, glancing at Eliza. She kept her voice low, so only the littles could hear the discussion. "What do you need?"

  "I may have a chance for a new papa." Eliza did not want to get her hopes up but it seemed to have already happened. Mr. Lockwood had returned, which could mean only one thing: he was there for little Eliza. "Tell me how to make him love me. Your papa visits you several times a week. I want that with my papa." She did not wish to admit how jealous she felt and hurt that Preston had enrolled her only to barely visit. It was as though he had sent her away to remove her from his life. Perhaps he had not thought she would agree to the circumstances of being little.

  "If you want his attention, then you have to take it," Clara said. "Are you sure you are up for the challenge?"

  Eliza nodded eagerly, unsure what the young woman had in mind.

  "Take the rest of the paint and pour it on Nanny Agnes."

  Had Clara lost her mind? "No." Eliza shook her head, eyes wide with fear. "I will get into trouble." She had caused her own fair share of issues over the past several months, but none had been intentional.

  Clara smiled. "That's the point. You want him to see you bent over your nanny's knee. If that was him outside the door, imagine how uncomfortable he would feel in his trousers with your bottom exposed?"

  Eliza's mouth dropped and a soft gasp escaped her lips. "You cannot be serious." She was to intentionally get spanked in order to get his attention? How was this a good plan to keep him around? "He will be mad and disappointed, Clara. Why would that make him stay? Would he not want a good little girl, not a misbehaving one?"

  "You will show him that you can be disciplined and your behavior corrected. My papa, after a harsh discipline, always comforts me." The blonde smiled, glancing up at the window. "You will have your chance soon." She stood to the right of Eliza, getting a better look at the headmaster's office from her angle. "They went into Headmaster Philip's office, but I do not think they will take long."

  Eliza assumed that the longer he spent with Headmaster Philip, the better her chances were of him sticking around and truly being her papa. He had not run from the knowledge of the littles' school. Why had he come to visit last week? Had it been in an effort to find a little for himself? She had not spoken very much to him, and yet her thoughts were constantly of him. What was wrong with her?

  "If you wish to win his heart, it will take time, Eliza. Start with the paint, let him witness the worst side of you now and what Nanny Agnes will do to stop it."

  Eliza did not particularly enjoy Nanny Agnes peppering her bottom with swats when she misbehaved. There had been no special comfort that Clara spoke of, though her papa had not been around, either. Preston had never witnessed her being put over the knee. "I do not know," Eliza said, a frown forming on her face. How was being naughty going to help? And she hated when Nanny Agnes spanked her. It was something she avoided if possible. Could she really get the courage to have her bottom spanked?

  "You will have to make a decision fast, your papa is leaving the office and shaking Headmaster Philip's hand."

  Maybe Clara was right. What harm could come from trying to win his attention? Eliza had been spanked before and though she was not a fan of such treatment, having his gaze set upon her would stir her heart.

  "Hurry up!" Clara hissed. "He is heading down the hall."

  Eliza grabbed the red paint that was still full to the brim and ran across the room, laughing nervously as she toppled the liquid on Nanny Agnes's dress. She would have preferred to dump the contents on her head but the woman sat too perfectly and had jumped up with wide eyes, almost as if she knew what was to come.

  "Little Eliza Stead!" Nanny Agnes grabbed her charge by the waist, pulled her over her knee, and lifted Eliza's gown to reveal her bloomers. With one swift movement, her nanny had pulled the cotton down past her knees and smacked the porcelain skin of her bottom, forcing Eliza to jump.

/>   She glanced up, only to see the two men heading out of the littles' hall and to the door that led to the exit. He was leaving?

  "Papa?" Eliza cried out, not that she expected him to hear her, but her heart hurt all the same. Why had he instructed her to call him 'Papa' when he would not so much as visit her? Had he changed his mind? What was going on?

  "Your Papa Preston is not coming back, little one." Nanny Agnes landed her rough calloused hand over Eliza's bottom. "I do not appreciate such unladylike behavior."

  "I am a little, not a lady!" Eliza spat. She might have been nineteen, but if they insisted she act like a little, she was giving it to her nanny at full capacity. Where the hell had her former papa gone? Why was Charley gone now, too?

  "You will learn to mind your manners." Nanny Agnes swatted her cheeks, splotching each side of her plush seat red.

  "Owie!" Eliza shrieked. She kicked, her legs flailing as she tried to get away. Her hips turned but it did not afford her the opportunity of escape. Why had she thought to listen to Clara? Her friend was probably smiling right now at her punishment, watching Eliza get her bum spanked for being naughty. "I do not wish to be here without my papa." Even though she had been thinking of Charley the last few days, Preston would have sufficed at the moment. Anyone to make her feel loved and cherished; that this lifestyle of being a little was worth the sacrifice she made.

  Smack. Smack. Smack.

  Her nanny continued spanking her charge, ignoring what she said. Was she awaiting an apology? Eliza did not wish to give the older woman one. Yes, she had been naughty pouring paint on her nanny's dress, but she had done so because Charley was supposed to notice her, watch the discipline, and act upon it. Had she thought wrong?

  She wiggled in an attempt to escape, but it did little good. Eliza could not break free from her nanny's strong grip. Why had she been foolish enough to listen to her friend? Clara was not the one with her bottom on display and getting disciplined!

  "Put me down!" Eliza's nose scrunched with every spank, wincing from the sharp biting sting.

  The door clicked from outside the hall, and her head turned up again, catching sight of Mr. Lockwood, the headmaster, and another woman who could not have been much older than her. Her stomach tensed and the tears burned her vision. Why had she been stupid enough to believe that he would desire her? Of course he had come to Ashby for and with his betrothed, just as Preston had brought her. The young woman had probably waited outside while he signed the papers, just as she had done many months ago.

  "How is this fair?" Eliza said, referring to the brunette who had accompanied Charley into the littles' school.

  "Perhaps we shall have you sit with Headmaster Philip and decide what is a fair punishment."

  Nanny Agnes seemed to have no idea what Eliza was talking about. Tears fell from the young woman's eyes, and she watched as Mr. Lockwood glanced at her ever so briefly before escorting the woman beside him down the hall, his arm around her shoulders. It looked as though they might be getting a new little this afternoon. There was no way Eliza would be nice to the new girl.

  "Please, no, Nanny Agnes. I am sorry." She did not want to find a cane being applied to her precious bottom. Her nanny's hand hurt, but it would leave no welts come tomorrow. The cane, however, would leave awful welts upon her skin.

  Nanny Agnes continued to smack her charge's bottom, reddening every speck of once porcelain skin, making certain it would hurt where she sat. "I am not pleased, little Eliza." She hoisted the young woman back onto her feet. "Keep your dress above your waist, and go stand with your nose in the corner. You will learn not to disrespect your nanny again."

  Wordlessly, little Eliza stalked to the corner of the playroom, pouting as she faced the corner, keeping her dress in her hands, bunched at her sides, to reveal her reddened bottom. Her cheeks burned with embarrassment at being on display so everyone could see the mistake she had made.

  The door squeaked open and she did not have the courage to turn around to see who had entered the playroom. Perhaps Nanny Agnes had stepped out to change her dress? Eliza had made quite a mess on the gown. She was lucky this had been the worst of her punishment. Silently, she prayed not to see the young woman with brown hair who accompanied Charley into Ashby. Perhaps the girl would fear the establishment and what it meant, leaving him without his betrothed. It was a horrible thought to have and yet Eliza did not feel it was fair for him to have teased her, to tell her to call him 'Papa' when he had a love of his own.

  She pouted and her eyes narrowed, glancing hastily over her shoulder to see Charley staring at her reddened bottom. The brunette was no longer at his side. Where had she gone? Was he waiting for her to join the other littles in the playroom? Eliza exhaled a heavy sigh, upset that she had no papa and the one man she thought might find his way into her heart had hurt her. She had acted on childish impulses, believing what he had said, feeling the first sparks of a crush that was not hers to have. Never again would she allow herself the pain of getting hurt, of feeling wanted, only to be pushed aside and cast out like rubbish. Preston had hurt her, and Charley… right now he seemed to be no better.

  Chapter VI

  Charley could not believe what he had seen upon bringing his younger sister into Ashby. Why was a grown woman over the knee of her nanny? The term still felt a bit outlandish considering she was nineteen, of an age to wed, not needing a caretaker to look after her. Although, by the looks of the level of discipline instilled and the paint that had stained both women's dresses, maybe a bare bottom spanking would put her in line. What had Eliza been thinking? Had it been an accident? He had not completely seen what was happening. On his way to the door to retrieve his younger sister, he had heard the shouts of an older woman who had apparently been displeased with something that had transpired in the playroom.

  He had not known the specifics until further investigating when he returned with his sister and had Leona finalize the paperwork, letting her follow Headmaster Philip to the finishing school. There was not much for his sister to see, as she was whisked straight to the office to sign papers and then through the corridor that led to the finishing school.

  Charley would miss Leona, but he was doing what was best for her. The time had come for them both to move on and start their new lives. With heavy footsteps, his boots thumped unceremoniously over the marble floor on his approach of the playroom. He intended only to watch, to study, and learn more about little Eliza. The entire concept of the littles' school felt foreign to him. A small part of him wanted to partake in the involvement of having a little, but he also felt conflicted. Charley needed a story that would impress James at the Daily Times, and this story of littles and nannies—it was colossal.

  Staring through the glass window, he could not help but smile as he gawked at Eliza's splotchy red cheeks. She held her dress up in the air, putting herself on display in the corner. His cock stirred in his trousers at the sight of her fleshy bum. Her demeanor was highly inappropriate and yet, he desired to have her turn around, to let him see every inch of her body.

  Watching from the window was a nice idea, but he could not contain his excitement or the thrill of seeing the discipline enforced. She had been a naughty girl. Evidence of her outburst earlier still marked her dress, as well as that of the nanny who had spanked her bottom. Charley wished he had been able to stay and watch the sight of her cheeks put on display, bent over. His erection continued to throb in his trousers to the point of discomfort. Regaining control of his mental and physical state proved almost impossible.

  He moved toward the door and paused, looking into the playroom. It was the first time he had been given the opportunity to truly examine the small space. The ceiling was painted like the sky, with thin trails of clouds high above on a warm sunny afternoon. The walls were covered in a fresh coat of yellow like the sun, with matching curtains affixed to the windows. The playroom had an abundance of toys appropriate for children, everything from a dollhouse to a tea set for the girls to play wit
h.

  Charley wanted to take notes about the inside of Ashby for his potential story, but instead silently intended to memorize every detail: notes would come later. The headmaster would not be pleased, but didn't London have a right to know what lay just outside the city? A taboo establishment where wealthy families sent their daughters to school? This story was almost too good to be true.

  His hand fell on the doorknob, and he pushed the door open. The wood squeaked as he entered, alerting everyone of his presence. Charley shut the door behind him. He wanted to call Eliza over, ask her why she had been naughty, but thought it best to speak with her caretaker. It was clear she was facing a punishment, and he did not want to interfere in the necessary discipline that she required.

  Her reddened cheeks had ceased to dull and her head turned, glancing back at him. Eliza's eyes widened and she gasped before shoving her nose back in the corner.

  Charley smiled, quite pleased that he had some effect on the young woman, even if it was minimal. He strode toward the nannies, glancing at the woman with red paint splattered on her gown. He thought it best to introduce himself and held out his hand. "My name is Mr. Charley Lockwood."

  The older woman with gray hair raised an eyebrow. Her brown gaze stared right up at him from the chair she sat in. "Does Headmaster Philip know you are in here, sir?"

  Charley nodded. "Yes, of course. I signed the papers this morning. Miss Stead is my betrothed."

  "I feel sorry for you," another nanny muttered under her breath.

  The woman with the red paint on her gown stood and offered her hand. "My name is Nanny Agnes. I am responsible for little Eliza. We had a bit of a difficult morning, but I expect she will be on her best behavior in your presence. Have you two met?"